above all ... love
Love … a word totally misunderstood, misplaced, and distorted. People have associated it mostly on feelings. When they feel good about a certain person or a situation, then it is love.
A man says “I love you” to a woman when he gets carried away by his emotions, which are mostly physical, then realizes later on that he doesn’t even like her that much. A woman says “I love you” to a man just because he has expressed interest for her and because she is so hungry for love. A man justifies a relationship with another woman and calls it love. A woman goes to bed with another woman and calls it love. It seems like love has become the biggest excuse to sin.
The problem is man’s heart which the Bible calls ‘deceitful’. Man has allowed himself to be controlled by his heart. This heart can’t discern what is right and wrong. When it feels good, it feels right. Thus, our feelings is not and should never be an indicator of what love is, otherwise we will just be tossed to and fro by our crazy emotions -- one minute we are in love, the next minute we are not.
This emotional concept of love has deceived not only the lost people but even those of us who are saved. Our associations of love are based on just the positive feelings but never the negative ones. A Christian showing gentle love by accepting the person for who he or she is, is considered more loving than the one who corrects a sinner and points him or her to the truth. Both gentle love and rebuking love are LOVE.
This emotional concept of love has deceived not only the lost people but even those of us who are saved. Our associations of love are based on just the positive feelings but never the negative ones. A Christian showing gentle love by accepting the person for who he or she is, is considered more loving than the one who corrects a sinner and points him or her to the truth. Both gentle love and rebuking love are LOVE.
Another issue about our concept of love is that we don’t really prioritize it. We think we do. We think we know about it. Honestly, we all fall short in this area. Most Christian leaders like me are more focused on our spiritual gifts and our respective callings in ministry. And even if we do extend godly love to others, we tend to neglect the people closest to us -- our spouses, children, and other immediate family members, most especially those family who are also in the Lord.
Honestly, it is easy to love people from a distance. It is easier for me to extend kindness and patience to a person who is not close to me because she doesn’t test my patience. On the other hand, it is more difficult for me to exercise patience for my husband who can really be a big test for me when he is going through something.
In 1 Corinthians 12, Paul talks about the different spiritual gifts that God has blessed us with. He said in verse 31: But earnestly desire and zealously cultivate the greatest and best gifts and graces. And yet I will show you a still more excellent way (one that is better by far and the highest of them all -- love).
What good is my ministry or any work I do for the Lord if I don’t have love? 1 Corinthians 14:1 says: Eagerly pursue and seek to acquire love; and earnestly desire and cultivate spiritual endowments. This means that our priority should be to pursue and seek love. How do we do that?
He who covers and forgives an offense SEEKS LOVE (Proverbs 17:9).
Forgiving an offense is one way of seeking love. There are other ways. The point is this … to seek love requires an opportunity to apply what it says in the Word about Biblical love. Love is patient, and to seek love in this area means that I will have to exercise patience in situations where my patience will be most tested, which is mostly from people closest to me, such as my husband.
Seeking love then is always looking out for opportunities where we can exercise love. The good news is that we don’t even have to look. God Himself sends opportunities to us in the form of trials. So instead of complaining or giving up when you are faced with these trials, look at it as a great opportunity to apply love. The more difficult the situation is to exercise love, the greater the chance of applying and extending godly love.
Seeking love then is always looking out for opportunities where we can exercise love. The good news is that we don’t even have to look. God Himself sends opportunities to us in the form of trials. So instead of complaining or giving up when you are faced with these trials, look at it as a great opportunity to apply love. The more difficult the situation is to exercise love, the greater the chance of applying and extending godly love.
The next time your spouse tests your patience, thank God for the opportunity and apply patience. The next time someone close to you hurts you, thank God for the opportunity and release forgiveness right away. Remember, love pays no attention to any wrong done. The next time you get offended, brush off the feeling and exercise love.
Lisa Maki is the founder/editor of Godz Gurlz web magazine. She is also a Professional Writer with over 15 years of experience in the field. Lisa shares what she learns in this journey particularly in the areas of emotional issues and marriage & relationships.