THE ARMOUR-BEARER WIFE: REBUILDING THE WALL
"You shall be called rebuilder of walls, restorer of homes (Isaiah 58:1)."
It was the most critical time in my marriage when God gave me this Scripture. I was physically separated from my husband then. He went through some major spiritual crisis that made me panic and ran away. Yes ... I ran away. And I ran away mad and hurt thinking that I was doing the right thing.
A few months before that incident, I dreamed of a woman I know from Facebook, an intercessor who God connected to me. In my dream she brought me a bouquet of multi-colored flowers. She parked her car and entered through my back door. I told her about my dream and she said that God is calling me to a higher level of intimacy with Him. I kind of brushed off her interpretation at that time. I was so busy with work and making ends meet and I had no extra time for fasting or quiet time with God more than what I already had. Besides, everything seemed okay. We were just getting adjusted to a new home we were renting, after being released from our care giving job for my husband’s grandmother.
Looking back to that dream, I now see the symbolisms more clearly. My intercessor friend symbolized the Father. The flowers symbolized love and romance – like God was wooing me to spend more time with Him so He can bring me to a higher level. The multi colors symbolized the brightness and beauty of what is going to take place. The back door symbolized God moving behind me without being noticed, which also explains why it was an unexpected visit.
Had I paid closer attention to the dream and what my friend was saying, things would have not happened the way they did. Instead, I panicked and even made my friend panic. All I saw was some demonic oppression. I tried warring in the spirit but I felt that the demons were so strong. I consulted other people of God without waiting on God to establish divine connections. I talked against my husband and formed alliances with those who were also suspicious of him and his behavior. In short, I gave up and turned over my husband to whatever was trying to take hold of him. I became hurt, bitter, and very rebellious.
It took a while before I realized what I had done. I repented, started picking up the pieces of the mess I made, and reconciled with my husband. Everything started to return to normalcy. I totally forgot about Isaiah 58:1 until God brought it back to my attention by leading me to Scriptures that talk about “rebuilding the walls”. It was still not making a lot of sense until the revelation on the Armour-Bearer wife was downloaded by the Holy Spirit to me. Only then did I begin to see deeper and deeper.
Before I go on, let me address one common question I have received from women who read the article: THE WIFE: THE ARMOUR-BEARER. The question is: “Shouldn’t my husband be the one protecting our marriage since he is the head?”
It was a friend of mine, Jacqueline Ani, who explained to me clearly that whoever is stronger spiritually in the marriage should stand in the gap. “Being stronger spiritually”, by the way, doesn’t have anything to do with titles or positions in ministry. It is one’s ability to discern that something is not right, and that there is an attack going on. Your husband may even be a Bishop, but at the time of the attack was not able to see what was about to happen. Remember my dream? That was God’s warning to me of something that was about to happen, but which I ignored.
There is a major attack going on in Christian marriages today, more so for those who are big threats to the demonic realm. If you are one of these women who are under severe attack, praise God because it assures you that the devil is scared of you. Strategically, the first person the devil will attack is the head of the marriage, your husband. No matter how spiritually strong your husband is, if the attack is on him then you are expected to stand in the gap. If your husband is not spiritually strong, then all the more should you be like Deborah, leading in the spiritual battle.
So ladies ... let us stop wishing and saying that our husbands should lead. They are already our leaders in the physical realm, technically, because God placed them above us. Instead, let us focus on our role as Armour-Bearers.
I am assuming that by now you have already read The Wife: The Armour-Bearer, and The Armour-Bearer Wife: Her Biggest Stronghold. I also believe that you are now in the process of healing from your wounds and are getting more geared up for your role as an Armour-Bearer. It is now time to strategize!
the strategy
The first step of the strategy then is to inspect the damage to the wall. This was what Nehemiah did in Nehemiah 2.
13 By night I went out through the Valley Gate toward the Jackal Well and the Dung Gate, examining the walls of Jerusalem, which had been broken down, and its gates, which had been destroyed by fire.
17 Then I said to them, “You see the trouble we are in: Jerusalem lies in ruins, and its gates have been burned with fire. Come, let us rebuild the wall of Jerusalem, and we will no longer be in disgrace.”
13 By night I went out through the Valley Gate toward the Jackal Well and the Dung Gate, examining the walls of Jerusalem, which had been broken down, and its gates, which had been destroyed by fire.
17 Then I said to them, “You see the trouble we are in: Jerusalem lies in ruins, and its gates have been burned with fire. Come, let us rebuild the wall of Jerusalem, and we will no longer be in disgrace.”
I want you to close your eyes now as you inspect the walls of your marriage. How severe is the damage? What parts of the walls are broken (trust, love, respect, romance, intimacy, fun, joy, peace)?
How did it break? What happened? Focus on what you did wrong and not what your husband did wrong. For instance, if the broken part of the wall is trust, look back to where it all started. When did you start losing trust in him? Why? What could you have done differently? What does God’s Word say about this?
These questions, as you inspect the damage to your walls, will also help you in your healing process. As you focus on yourself and what you did wrong, your issues will be exposed. This is the prerequisite to true healing.
How did it break? What happened? Focus on what you did wrong and not what your husband did wrong. For instance, if the broken part of the wall is trust, look back to where it all started. When did you start losing trust in him? Why? What could you have done differently? What does God’s Word say about this?
These questions, as you inspect the damage to your walls, will also help you in your healing process. As you focus on yourself and what you did wrong, your issues will be exposed. This is the prerequisite to true healing.
Remember what I said in my previous article??? You can’t be an effective Armour-Bearer if you are wounded. You need to heal. However, you don’t need to be perfectly healed to start rebuilding your walls. You will have to do it simultaneously.
Those who carried materials did their work with one hand and held a weapon in the other (Nehemiah 4:17).
The second step of the strategy is to take note of your personal strongholds, followed by your husband’s strongholds.
You would need to write all these down. I created two columns when I did this: one for me and one for my husband. And please ... you do not need to let your husband know about this. There are things that you have to keep between you and the Lord first until it is time. Strategizing requires wisdom and discretion. This is what Nehemiah did. He investigated in secret.
You would need to write all these down. I created two columns when I did this: one for me and one for my husband. And please ... you do not need to let your husband know about this. There are things that you have to keep between you and the Lord first until it is time. Strategizing requires wisdom and discretion. This is what Nehemiah did. He investigated in secret.
Through your investigation of your walls and the parts that are broken, God will begin to show you your issues. As you become more open to God’s healing, He will begin to dig deeper and show you the strongholds that have been controlling you all these years. These strongholds are the very reasons why your walls are broken. Until you attack the root source, the walls will just keep falling and breaking.
Write down all issues first and let God show you which ones are the strongholds. Strongholds are the root issues. For instance, if your issue is insecurity, the stronghold may be rejection.
Write down all issues first and let God show you which ones are the strongholds. Strongholds are the root issues. For instance, if your issue is insecurity, the stronghold may be rejection.
The third step of the strategy is to prepare to war in the spirit.
Nobody enters the battlefield unprepared. It is the kind of preparation one does that dictates the victory or defeat. Sometimes, the enemy will just run away scared, only to return again with a stronger force. Our mindset should be only one thing: TO WIN AND TOTALLY DESTROY THE ENEMY.
Nobody enters the battlefield unprepared. It is the kind of preparation one does that dictates the victory or defeat. Sometimes, the enemy will just run away scared, only to return again with a stronger force. Our mindset should be only one thing: TO WIN AND TOTALLY DESTROY THE ENEMY.
Fasting is the best way to prepare for battle. This is a tried-and-tested method in the Bible. Pray on the kind of fast that God is calling you to do. You can do a one day absolute fast, a 21 day Daniel fast, a few hours of fast each day for three or more days, etc. The best fast is a 40-day fast. However, this is not for everyone, more so if your health or schedule will not allow it. There are so many varieties of fast. Pray for God’s perfect will and what will work best for you.
Having a consistent time alone with God everyday is another way to prepare. David said in Psalm 27:4-6:
One thing I ask; that will I seek; that I will dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of His holiness and inquire in His temple...He will conceal me there when troubles come. He will hide me in His sanctuary. He will place me out of reach on a high rock. Then I will hold my head high above my enemies who surround me.
Having a consistent time alone with God everyday is another way to prepare. David said in Psalm 27:4-6:
One thing I ask; that will I seek; that I will dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of His holiness and inquire in His temple...He will conceal me there when troubles come. He will hide me in His sanctuary. He will place me out of reach on a high rock. Then I will hold my head high above my enemies who surround me.
Part of preparation is to schedule your battle. Choose a day, place, and time where you will do it. Be sure you have your list of strongholds with you. Your warfare should cover these different parts: worship, declaration of God’s promises, intercession for your husband, and cutting off the heads of those strongholds.
The fourth step is the actual day of battle.
I put on my prayer shawl when I enter the battlefield. I start with worship, lifting up and exalting the Father. I follow it up with declaration of His promises. These promises are Scriptures (you should have this ready, written on paper) pertaining to healing, deliverance, spiritual warfare, and everything else you are warring for in the spirit. I then put on my sackcloth and begin interceding for my husband. I act like his lawyer, pleading his case before God. I love this part because it makes me see my husband for who he really is, the way God created him. It makes me put myself in his shoes – feeling what he is feeling and thinking what he is thinking. When I intercede for my husband, God floods me with compassion for him. It is some sort of healing for me too. This intercession is followed by the actual warfare. I position myself again in worship then stand up to declare war with the devil. I command my angels, in the name of Yeshua to guard the four corners of my house.
I put on my prayer shawl when I enter the battlefield. I start with worship, lifting up and exalting the Father. I follow it up with declaration of His promises. These promises are Scriptures (you should have this ready, written on paper) pertaining to healing, deliverance, spiritual warfare, and everything else you are warring for in the spirit. I then put on my sackcloth and begin interceding for my husband. I act like his lawyer, pleading his case before God. I love this part because it makes me see my husband for who he really is, the way God created him. It makes me put myself in his shoes – feeling what he is feeling and thinking what he is thinking. When I intercede for my husband, God floods me with compassion for him. It is some sort of healing for me too. This intercession is followed by the actual warfare. I position myself again in worship then stand up to declare war with the devil. I command my angels, in the name of Yeshua to guard the four corners of my house.
I put on my whole armour and declare the authority that God has given me to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy. I call down from the second heavens (where demons are) stronghold after stronghold, demonic kings and spirits in charge of these strongholds. I take my sword and cut off the heads of these demons, in the name of Yeshua, by the power of the Holy Spirit. Finally, I see in the spiritual realm, all my enemies defeated and dead. I go back to the Father’s throne and celebrate with thanksgiving and praise.
Now you see why this battle takes preparation? It is no joke. I get so exhausted and even tired for days after a warfare. Sometimes, you may even have to do it for several days, not necessarily consecutively. Again, create a strategy that will work for you.
Once you have destroyed strongholds, other issues may continue to pop up. This is God’s way of showing you what may still be there that you haven’t addressed. You can destroy more strongholds after your major war, without going through the same extensive process.
Once you have destroyed strongholds, other issues may continue to pop up. This is God’s way of showing you what may still be there that you haven’t addressed. You can destroy more strongholds after your major war, without going through the same extensive process.
Destroying these strongholds is the most critical part in rebuilding your walls. Maintaining your time alone with God each day in prayer and Word will continue to rebuild your walls on the right foundation. Making sure that you use the mind of your spirit and not your flesh is another way of rebuilding and strengthening these walls. Keeping yourself uncontaminated by the world and sin is part of strengthening your walls too. Having a repentant spirit is another key.
One thing I also want you to bear in mind is that for every new journey and/or promotion, there are new enemies to conquer and defeat. This was the case with the Israelites in every journey they took, and every land they possessed. The good thing about it is that God crosses over ahead of us. He said this Himself in Deuteronomy 31. Let me quote the verses for you. The words in parenthesis are my own paraphrased words.
The Lord your God Himself will cross over ahead of you. The Lord will destroy the (enemies) living in the land. The Lord will hand over to you (the enemies) who live there and you must deal with them. Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you (verses 3-6).
Another promise God gave us is in Zechariah 2:5.
The Lord your God Himself will cross over ahead of you. The Lord will destroy the (enemies) living in the land. The Lord will hand over to you (the enemies) who live there and you must deal with them. Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the Lord your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you (verses 3-6).
Another promise God gave us is in Zechariah 2:5.
For I, says the Lord, will be to her a wall of fire round about, and I will be the glory in the midst of her.
Isn’t that amazing? God Himself will be our wall, and not just a wall but a “wall of fire”, with His glory in the midst of us. Wow!
Please proceed to Part IV: The Amour-Bearer Wife: The King-Maker
Lisa Maki
07 August 2015
07 August 2015