Men of God ... Be Careful of Your Actions Towards Women
Men of God are the most wonderful men in the world. I mean I am talking about real men of God and not just those who profess to be Christians. I am referring to men who are truly surrendered to Jesus and who follow His Word. I am talking about men who truly reflect Jesus in their lives. They are the nicest, most gentle, polite, loving, caring, and passionate men. They are every woman’s dream to have as boyfriends and husbands.
There is something about this type of man that draws women to him. He stands out over the men of the world because he is set apart. Worldly women are attracted to him out of curiosity and women of God are attracted to him because of who he represents. The downside of this is the temptations men of God face. Yet, more than this is how his actions can easily mislead women.
The purpose of this article is to make men of God aware of how they affect women and what they should be careful about.
Men, you have to understand that women are vulnerable to kindness and gentleness. They want to be treated this way and will be attracted to men who give them this special treatment. A woman who is very hungry for attention is even more prone to your acts of kindness. She may view it as more than kindness and may look at you as liking her in a special way. You wouldn’t want her to think this way unless you really like her. You wouldn’t want to lead her on and have her make false assumptions about you. Though you are not responsible for how she feels, as a man of God, you have to be cautious of how you may make her feel.
So how do you handle this situation? It’s not as if you should stop being kind and gentle to women. My sisterly advice is: keep your boundaries and maintain a distance. Don’t be over friendly. Don’t be hugging every girl you see, not even in church. I also advise that you be careful about saying the words “I love you”, even if what you mean is “I love you in Jesus”. Just say “Jesus loves you”.
And if you are married, you don’t have any business being close to other women. You can fellowship with women if you are in a group environment but avoid having a one-on-one conversation when you are alone. Believe me, I’ve seen the most righteous men fall into this trap.
Another thing you have to understand about women is that they love to be heard. A man who is a good listener is very easy to be attracted to. Aren’t you wondering why Eve was tempted by the devil? The enemy knew her weakness so well and engaged her in a conversation. Eve felt good that she was able to express herself. If a woman opens up to you and you listen to her, she may end up pouring out everything to you and feel connected with you.
I once counseled a wife and her husband. The husband is a lawyer who was handling an annulment case at that time. His client was a beautiful lady doctor. The wife started suspecting something because the husband would get text messages from the client at three in the morning. The husband always justified it as, “it’s purely business”. When I finally had a talk with both the husband and wife, I told the lawyer husband why the feelings or her wife are justifiable. I then asked him to tell me the whole truth and he was honest enough to say that nothing is going on and that it was purely business. I believed him because he really looked and sounded sincere.
Theirs was a classic case of a man who was counseling a woman and how he made her feel. Though he was a lawyer, he was also a counselor and sounding board at that time because he was making a case for her. He was interviewing her to make the annulment case strong. And since it was a marriage issue, certain intimate topics were discussed such as the sex life of the client with her husband. As the meetings progressed, so were the feelings of the lady doctor. She felt connected with her lawyer because of the intimate things that he knew about her.
So my advice to you, my dear brothers in Christ, is to avoid getting into deep conversations with women, unless you are building a relationship with her. You can talk about deep things concerning God and His Word, but when you see it gearing towards more personal or intimate topics, just change the subject or be honest enough to say that you shouldn’t be talking about those things. Better yet, get into a prayer together and pray for her.
And if you are married, you don’t have any business engaging in deep conversations with the opposite sex, even if it is about God, unless you are in a group setting.
I remember this prophet who my husband was talking to on the phone and who was prophesying to him. My husband said, “I will let you speak to my wife so you can also prophesy to her”, to which he said, “I don’t deal with women. She can talk to my wife”. That really blessed me.
In another incident, my husband called someone who advertised a motorcycle on craigslist and it was a lady who answered the phone. The lady kept talking and talking to him until it led to some intimate topics (she just went through a divorce, btw). My husband was quick to say, “My wife is here. You should just talk to her”. That made her stop talking and the funny thing was she didn’t even want to talk to me.
Lastly, a woman can exaggerate your compliments. You may say, “You’re looking good today” because you want to encourage her and she may think that you like her or are attracted to her. It’s just the way she is. She is most of the time two steps ahead of what is going on. She also tends to live in a fantasy world. Honestly, you don’t have to flatter a woman to make her feel better or encourage her. The best thing you can say is: “God sees what you are doing. He will bless you for it”.
All you really have to do is follow Jesus’ examples. He was the gentlest, most loving man who ever walked this planet and for sure he looked good physically. Yet, he never let any woman feel misled. I don’t know how Jesus did it. I presume that it was him being about the Father’s business at all times. It was never about Him. So, if you keep it Jesus at all times and if you will keep yourself out of the picture, then I believe you will do fine. Be very discerning and follow the leading of the Spirit every step of the way.
God bless you!
~Lisa Maki~
There is something about this type of man that draws women to him. He stands out over the men of the world because he is set apart. Worldly women are attracted to him out of curiosity and women of God are attracted to him because of who he represents. The downside of this is the temptations men of God face. Yet, more than this is how his actions can easily mislead women.
The purpose of this article is to make men of God aware of how they affect women and what they should be careful about.
Men, you have to understand that women are vulnerable to kindness and gentleness. They want to be treated this way and will be attracted to men who give them this special treatment. A woman who is very hungry for attention is even more prone to your acts of kindness. She may view it as more than kindness and may look at you as liking her in a special way. You wouldn’t want her to think this way unless you really like her. You wouldn’t want to lead her on and have her make false assumptions about you. Though you are not responsible for how she feels, as a man of God, you have to be cautious of how you may make her feel.
So how do you handle this situation? It’s not as if you should stop being kind and gentle to women. My sisterly advice is: keep your boundaries and maintain a distance. Don’t be over friendly. Don’t be hugging every girl you see, not even in church. I also advise that you be careful about saying the words “I love you”, even if what you mean is “I love you in Jesus”. Just say “Jesus loves you”.
And if you are married, you don’t have any business being close to other women. You can fellowship with women if you are in a group environment but avoid having a one-on-one conversation when you are alone. Believe me, I’ve seen the most righteous men fall into this trap.
Another thing you have to understand about women is that they love to be heard. A man who is a good listener is very easy to be attracted to. Aren’t you wondering why Eve was tempted by the devil? The enemy knew her weakness so well and engaged her in a conversation. Eve felt good that she was able to express herself. If a woman opens up to you and you listen to her, she may end up pouring out everything to you and feel connected with you.
I once counseled a wife and her husband. The husband is a lawyer who was handling an annulment case at that time. His client was a beautiful lady doctor. The wife started suspecting something because the husband would get text messages from the client at three in the morning. The husband always justified it as, “it’s purely business”. When I finally had a talk with both the husband and wife, I told the lawyer husband why the feelings or her wife are justifiable. I then asked him to tell me the whole truth and he was honest enough to say that nothing is going on and that it was purely business. I believed him because he really looked and sounded sincere.
Theirs was a classic case of a man who was counseling a woman and how he made her feel. Though he was a lawyer, he was also a counselor and sounding board at that time because he was making a case for her. He was interviewing her to make the annulment case strong. And since it was a marriage issue, certain intimate topics were discussed such as the sex life of the client with her husband. As the meetings progressed, so were the feelings of the lady doctor. She felt connected with her lawyer because of the intimate things that he knew about her.
So my advice to you, my dear brothers in Christ, is to avoid getting into deep conversations with women, unless you are building a relationship with her. You can talk about deep things concerning God and His Word, but when you see it gearing towards more personal or intimate topics, just change the subject or be honest enough to say that you shouldn’t be talking about those things. Better yet, get into a prayer together and pray for her.
And if you are married, you don’t have any business engaging in deep conversations with the opposite sex, even if it is about God, unless you are in a group setting.
I remember this prophet who my husband was talking to on the phone and who was prophesying to him. My husband said, “I will let you speak to my wife so you can also prophesy to her”, to which he said, “I don’t deal with women. She can talk to my wife”. That really blessed me.
In another incident, my husband called someone who advertised a motorcycle on craigslist and it was a lady who answered the phone. The lady kept talking and talking to him until it led to some intimate topics (she just went through a divorce, btw). My husband was quick to say, “My wife is here. You should just talk to her”. That made her stop talking and the funny thing was she didn’t even want to talk to me.
Lastly, a woman can exaggerate your compliments. You may say, “You’re looking good today” because you want to encourage her and she may think that you like her or are attracted to her. It’s just the way she is. She is most of the time two steps ahead of what is going on. She also tends to live in a fantasy world. Honestly, you don’t have to flatter a woman to make her feel better or encourage her. The best thing you can say is: “God sees what you are doing. He will bless you for it”.
All you really have to do is follow Jesus’ examples. He was the gentlest, most loving man who ever walked this planet and for sure he looked good physically. Yet, he never let any woman feel misled. I don’t know how Jesus did it. I presume that it was him being about the Father’s business at all times. It was never about Him. So, if you keep it Jesus at all times and if you will keep yourself out of the picture, then I believe you will do fine. Be very discerning and follow the leading of the Spirit every step of the way.
God bless you!
~Lisa Maki~
Dealing with Arguments in Marriage
My husband is a confrontational man who can be very provoking, while I am a woman who always defends her side when confronted. He is a man who loves correcting others while I am not easy to receive correction. What a perfect concoction for God’s miraculous move. Indeed, this placed a great challenge in our marriage and definitely put us on high risk. I didn’t realize this deadly combination of issues and personalities until I saw the worst in both of us during our arguments. During those fights, the very love I feel for my husband instantly turns into hatred just over some petty issue that blew out of proportion. It hurt my heart like crazy, took my peace away, stressed me out, and made me feel stupid later on. The worst part about it is I always feel separated and divided from him after an argument.
I know there are couples who don’t get into heated arguments or big fights. I won’t say this is better than getting into the kind of arguments that my husband and I used to go through. On the contrary, those who never argue may be burying issues so deep that they never get resolved. I know a man who drifted away from his wife just because they never talked about their problems in their marriage.
For me, “arguments in marriage” is an attempt by the husband, wife, or both, to communicate and express their opinions about certain things or situations. It is a form of communication that is more of a misunderstanding than getting the message across. Unless the person just loves to argue, most arguments stem from a wrong perception of what the other one is trying to say. In short, arguments happen because of misunderstanding. To manage an argument then is to start understanding where the other person is coming from. Of course this is easier said than done when you are already in the middle of an argument, which is why dealing with arguments start prior to the argument itself. How do you do that?
I had to go through a lot of heated arguments and painful results for me to learn what I am going to share with you now. So thank God for letting me go through what I’ve been through. It was meant to make it easier for you to deal with and manage your arguments better.
The first step is for you to look back to the arguments you’ve had with your spouse. What caused it? What was your role in it? If you were the one who provoked him, examine yourself. If he was the one who provoked you, examine yourself still. Beneath your arguments are issues that God is exposing because He wants to heal them. Stop looking at your husband’s fault for a moment and just focus on yours. Keep analyzing and examining yourself and ask God to reveal yourself to you. What triggers you to argue with your husband? Why?
In my case my biggest issue was fear of rejection. I didn’t know this until God started revealing it to me. My being defensive when my husband corrected me was my way of defending myself from being attacked. I looked at my husband’s correction as rejection. I felt he was not appreciating the good things but always looking at the negative things. I felt I was not pleasing him enough and that he doesn’t love me. What a lie! Yet that was exactly how I felt each time he corrected me, which surely led to a heated argument.
I am not saying that all our arguments were my fault. Yet, my reaction towards it was a reflection of issues I had within me, issues that God was exposing so He can heal me thoroughly.
As I’ve said earlier, I’ve always felt separated from my husband after an argument. It was the after effect that was more painful than the actual argument itself. It was that aftermath when the enemy kept replaying in my mind every hurtful word my husband said, like a tape recorder playing over and over and over again. This was the part that tortured me and which made me cry out to God seriously for help. It was then that God opened my eyes to what my husband feels during our arguments ... why he acted why he acted and why he said what he said. In short, God put me in my husband’s shoes for me to see where he was coming from. I started understanding him and his issues more than ever and I started praying for him.
After examining yourself and after asking God to put you in your husband’s shoes, I want you to meditate on 1 Peter 3:1-4
In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives. Don't be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God.
Pay attention to the phrase QUIET SPIRIT and what it does to your husband. If this is very difficult for you, ask God to see you through.
This Scripture was given to me by God when I was praying to Him one time and complaining about my husband. When I saw the words, QUIET SPIRIT, I cried. I knew then what God was telling me to do and it convicted me but almost discouraged me at the same time. It was just so difficult to have a quiet spirit when you have a husband who is very provoking during an argument.
What I’ve learned from this is that I can’t have a quiet spirit during an argument if I don’t have that quiet spirit in me as part of my character. God had to make it clear to me that having a quiet spirit does not mean not talking or being passive but having that inner strength that will silence anyone who plans to attack me. It was the same quiet spirit that Jesus had on Him when He was being provoked by His accusers and He remained silent. When I finally understood this, it became easier for me to have that quiet spirit.
Another thing I’ve learned is to detect the argument when it is starting. This is when I start praying in my mind for God’s grace and strength. This is when I bridle my tongue and control my flesh who wants to defend herself or to answer back.
Honestly, it’s pointless defending yourself or explaining your side in the midst of an argument. The best thing to do is let the argument subside and when things have settled down, then that’s the time to talk.
Psalm 37:14 says: Seek, inquire for, and crave peace and pursue (go after) it!
Avoiding an argument from escalating is a way of putting this Scripture into action.
Recently, my husband was telling his Aunt how my having a quiet spirit has helped pacify his anger and has convicted him and made him feel stupid. That’s when I really knew that God has done a great work in me and continues to do so.
~Lisa Maki~
I know there are couples who don’t get into heated arguments or big fights. I won’t say this is better than getting into the kind of arguments that my husband and I used to go through. On the contrary, those who never argue may be burying issues so deep that they never get resolved. I know a man who drifted away from his wife just because they never talked about their problems in their marriage.
For me, “arguments in marriage” is an attempt by the husband, wife, or both, to communicate and express their opinions about certain things or situations. It is a form of communication that is more of a misunderstanding than getting the message across. Unless the person just loves to argue, most arguments stem from a wrong perception of what the other one is trying to say. In short, arguments happen because of misunderstanding. To manage an argument then is to start understanding where the other person is coming from. Of course this is easier said than done when you are already in the middle of an argument, which is why dealing with arguments start prior to the argument itself. How do you do that?
I had to go through a lot of heated arguments and painful results for me to learn what I am going to share with you now. So thank God for letting me go through what I’ve been through. It was meant to make it easier for you to deal with and manage your arguments better.
The first step is for you to look back to the arguments you’ve had with your spouse. What caused it? What was your role in it? If you were the one who provoked him, examine yourself. If he was the one who provoked you, examine yourself still. Beneath your arguments are issues that God is exposing because He wants to heal them. Stop looking at your husband’s fault for a moment and just focus on yours. Keep analyzing and examining yourself and ask God to reveal yourself to you. What triggers you to argue with your husband? Why?
In my case my biggest issue was fear of rejection. I didn’t know this until God started revealing it to me. My being defensive when my husband corrected me was my way of defending myself from being attacked. I looked at my husband’s correction as rejection. I felt he was not appreciating the good things but always looking at the negative things. I felt I was not pleasing him enough and that he doesn’t love me. What a lie! Yet that was exactly how I felt each time he corrected me, which surely led to a heated argument.
I am not saying that all our arguments were my fault. Yet, my reaction towards it was a reflection of issues I had within me, issues that God was exposing so He can heal me thoroughly.
As I’ve said earlier, I’ve always felt separated from my husband after an argument. It was the after effect that was more painful than the actual argument itself. It was that aftermath when the enemy kept replaying in my mind every hurtful word my husband said, like a tape recorder playing over and over and over again. This was the part that tortured me and which made me cry out to God seriously for help. It was then that God opened my eyes to what my husband feels during our arguments ... why he acted why he acted and why he said what he said. In short, God put me in my husband’s shoes for me to see where he was coming from. I started understanding him and his issues more than ever and I started praying for him.
After examining yourself and after asking God to put you in your husband’s shoes, I want you to meditate on 1 Peter 3:1-4
In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives. Don't be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God.
Pay attention to the phrase QUIET SPIRIT and what it does to your husband. If this is very difficult for you, ask God to see you through.
This Scripture was given to me by God when I was praying to Him one time and complaining about my husband. When I saw the words, QUIET SPIRIT, I cried. I knew then what God was telling me to do and it convicted me but almost discouraged me at the same time. It was just so difficult to have a quiet spirit when you have a husband who is very provoking during an argument.
What I’ve learned from this is that I can’t have a quiet spirit during an argument if I don’t have that quiet spirit in me as part of my character. God had to make it clear to me that having a quiet spirit does not mean not talking or being passive but having that inner strength that will silence anyone who plans to attack me. It was the same quiet spirit that Jesus had on Him when He was being provoked by His accusers and He remained silent. When I finally understood this, it became easier for me to have that quiet spirit.
Another thing I’ve learned is to detect the argument when it is starting. This is when I start praying in my mind for God’s grace and strength. This is when I bridle my tongue and control my flesh who wants to defend herself or to answer back.
Honestly, it’s pointless defending yourself or explaining your side in the midst of an argument. The best thing to do is let the argument subside and when things have settled down, then that’s the time to talk.
Psalm 37:14 says: Seek, inquire for, and crave peace and pursue (go after) it!
Avoiding an argument from escalating is a way of putting this Scripture into action.
Recently, my husband was telling his Aunt how my having a quiet spirit has helped pacify his anger and has convicted him and made him feel stupid. That’s when I really knew that God has done a great work in me and continues to do so.
~Lisa Maki~
I Will Obey If ...
I reminded a sister in the Lord recently of her wrong relationship and how her blessings get hindered because of her sin. She said, “I have been praying for God to remove my feelings for him, then it’s going to be easier for me to let go”. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work this way. God is not going to answer a prayer like that. He will not remove the feelings so you can obey Him. He wants to be obeyed at all costs, whether you feel like doing it or not, and whether it is going to be easy or not.
Obeying the Lord is not easy. The flesh will always resist, kick, and scream. Galatians 5:17 says: For the desires of the flesh are opposed to the [Holy] Spirit, and the [desires of the] Spirit are opposed to the flesh (godless human nature); for these are antagonistic to each other. Thus, if you wait for your flesh to start feeling good before you obey the Lord, it will never work. If you wait for your circumstances to improve before you make that step, it will never happen too. Your flesh will never run out of excuses. It is like a spoiled kid who will refuse to do what you tell her to do, even if it is right for her.
Jesus said: If you love me you will obey what I command (John 14:15). Here we are saying that we love Jesus but if we don’t obey Him, we don’t really love Him. “But I really love the Lord”, you may say, “It’s just that my situation is so difficult. He has a baby with me and I need him for this baby”. I totally understand this. I was there once. I used to live with a man I was not married to and who wasn’t divorced yet from his wife at that time. It was a very difficult decision, yet I chose to obey the Lord because I love Him.
So what made me able to do it and how come others can’t do it?
I believe that two of the biggest hindrances to obeying the Lord are fear and doubt: fear of the unknown, and doubt that it may not work out. Both were present in me when I took that step to obey God. What made me overcome my fear was a bigger vision that I saw ... something better than what I had. I knew that I will never get there until I obey and make that step of faith. What made me overcome my doubt was God’s constant assurance through His Word.
Remember that fear gets bigger as you get scared, but becomes smaller as you confront it through your obedience to God’s Word. What you are actually afraid of is just an illusion. It is merely a mirage that is not actually there. It is a lie from the devil meant to stop you from obeying God and receiving the fullness of His blessings.
Doubt is the twin sister of fear. You doubt because you don’t know the way and the outcome. As you get more familiar with the new way, your doubt fades away. Sad to say, we have to overcome doubt first before the road becomes familiar. It doesn’t happen the other way around. The good news is: God shows us a glimpse of the future through His Word.
Hebrews 11:1 says: Now faith is the assurance of the things [we] hope for, being the proof of things [we] do not see and the conviction of their reality [faith perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses].
Faith is the opposite of doubt. We don’t exercise faith over something we see. We see something as a result of our faith. Romans 4:16 says: Therefore, [inheriting] the promise is the outcome of faith and depends [entirely] on faith.
God has the best plans for you. He wants nothing but the best for you. However, for His best plans to happen to you, you have to follow what He tells you to. He can only release His blessings to you once you start obeying Him. It is obedience that unlocks God’s miracle working power in your life. He wants to give you the best marriage, the best family, the best job, the best life ever. The devil wants to steal everything from you so he blocks your blessings through your disobedience.
When you start obeying regardless of how you feel, you start clearing away that hindrance to God’s blessings. The fear that you may have will start getting smaller and smaller. As you read God’s Word and His promises to you, and start believing them for what they say, it will start manifesting in the physical realm. Your faith will transform the spiritual, which is God’s Word, to the physical, which is reality.
I encourage you now to take that leap of faith. Just obey. No more ifs and buts. Take that first step and never look back. Take it from me who was there once. When I made the decision to obey God and leave a wrong relationship, God showed me through His Word that I was going to get married. I believed His Word for what it was. I held on to it. Now I have a very blessed marriage to the man of my dreams ... my promised man ... the fruit of my obedience to God.
~Lisa Maki~
Obeying the Lord is not easy. The flesh will always resist, kick, and scream. Galatians 5:17 says: For the desires of the flesh are opposed to the [Holy] Spirit, and the [desires of the] Spirit are opposed to the flesh (godless human nature); for these are antagonistic to each other. Thus, if you wait for your flesh to start feeling good before you obey the Lord, it will never work. If you wait for your circumstances to improve before you make that step, it will never happen too. Your flesh will never run out of excuses. It is like a spoiled kid who will refuse to do what you tell her to do, even if it is right for her.
Jesus said: If you love me you will obey what I command (John 14:15). Here we are saying that we love Jesus but if we don’t obey Him, we don’t really love Him. “But I really love the Lord”, you may say, “It’s just that my situation is so difficult. He has a baby with me and I need him for this baby”. I totally understand this. I was there once. I used to live with a man I was not married to and who wasn’t divorced yet from his wife at that time. It was a very difficult decision, yet I chose to obey the Lord because I love Him.
So what made me able to do it and how come others can’t do it?
I believe that two of the biggest hindrances to obeying the Lord are fear and doubt: fear of the unknown, and doubt that it may not work out. Both were present in me when I took that step to obey God. What made me overcome my fear was a bigger vision that I saw ... something better than what I had. I knew that I will never get there until I obey and make that step of faith. What made me overcome my doubt was God’s constant assurance through His Word.
Remember that fear gets bigger as you get scared, but becomes smaller as you confront it through your obedience to God’s Word. What you are actually afraid of is just an illusion. It is merely a mirage that is not actually there. It is a lie from the devil meant to stop you from obeying God and receiving the fullness of His blessings.
Doubt is the twin sister of fear. You doubt because you don’t know the way and the outcome. As you get more familiar with the new way, your doubt fades away. Sad to say, we have to overcome doubt first before the road becomes familiar. It doesn’t happen the other way around. The good news is: God shows us a glimpse of the future through His Word.
Hebrews 11:1 says: Now faith is the assurance of the things [we] hope for, being the proof of things [we] do not see and the conviction of their reality [faith perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses].
Faith is the opposite of doubt. We don’t exercise faith over something we see. We see something as a result of our faith. Romans 4:16 says: Therefore, [inheriting] the promise is the outcome of faith and depends [entirely] on faith.
God has the best plans for you. He wants nothing but the best for you. However, for His best plans to happen to you, you have to follow what He tells you to. He can only release His blessings to you once you start obeying Him. It is obedience that unlocks God’s miracle working power in your life. He wants to give you the best marriage, the best family, the best job, the best life ever. The devil wants to steal everything from you so he blocks your blessings through your disobedience.
When you start obeying regardless of how you feel, you start clearing away that hindrance to God’s blessings. The fear that you may have will start getting smaller and smaller. As you read God’s Word and His promises to you, and start believing them for what they say, it will start manifesting in the physical realm. Your faith will transform the spiritual, which is God’s Word, to the physical, which is reality.
I encourage you now to take that leap of faith. Just obey. No more ifs and buts. Take that first step and never look back. Take it from me who was there once. When I made the decision to obey God and leave a wrong relationship, God showed me through His Word that I was going to get married. I believed His Word for what it was. I held on to it. Now I have a very blessed marriage to the man of my dreams ... my promised man ... the fruit of my obedience to God.
~Lisa Maki~
I Surrender All
I have always been a person that has been able to help other people with their problems, but I can’t help myself all the time. It’s been a rough road when you consider trusting other people because people will tend to disappoint you a lot. God is always there but it’s hard because you can’t physically cry on His shoulder, or He can’t hold you when you cry. I’ve always been a person that needed that physical closeness when I’m going through something. I need a shoulder, ear, or to be held. It’s not anything bad, but it’s just the basic need as a person and as a woman. I’m strong 95% of the time but its not easy being strong all the time. I wonder sometimes what made me get to this point, meaning how did I become so strong all the time that I sometimes can’t seem to turn it off?
As women we are supposed to be soft, gentle, and nurturing, but does that mean we are meant to be walked all over? I’ve had that happen to me and it’s honestly the reason I became so tough that it’s affected my relationships from that point on. My son is the only person I’d say that actually has seen my softer side, and of course my close friends and family, but sometimes I wonder if they truly know all facets of me. Whenever I’ve tried to solve a problem myself it has always backfired in a big way. If I’ve sought help from someone else it’s gone a little better, but if I’ve trusted God it has always turned out right.
My life is far from simple, it never has been well scratched that it was simple when I was a child and didn’t realize just how difficult life truly was. Man, sometimes I sure wish I could go back to those days before you realized what responsibilities are. Having fun takes on a whole new meaning and then you look up and you’re responsible for someone else as well. Being a mom is a fabulous experience but it’s very scary because if you make a decision for yourself and it doesn’t work out then it will affect your child. Never mind if it’s just you who will get affected because as an adult you will bounce back. But when you make a decision for your child you have to think really long and really hard about how it’s all going to work out. The consequences are totally different and it becomes apparent very quickly.
God hears our cries even when we ourselves don’t realize we’re crying out for Him. I find it comforting to know that when no one else has time to hear my thoughts, cares, concerns or complaints God ALWAYS hears me. Once you decide to surrender all your heart, cares, and desires to God you realize you don’t have to do it alone and you’re not alone. You begin to receive great comfort. Once I stopped trying to control everything and allow God to have his will in my life, everything that was supposed to happen did, and I’ve been insanely blessed ever since. You have to make a decision that this is where you want to be and God is who you trust your everything to, then you will slowly see your life transform.
~Joy Norman~
As women we are supposed to be soft, gentle, and nurturing, but does that mean we are meant to be walked all over? I’ve had that happen to me and it’s honestly the reason I became so tough that it’s affected my relationships from that point on. My son is the only person I’d say that actually has seen my softer side, and of course my close friends and family, but sometimes I wonder if they truly know all facets of me. Whenever I’ve tried to solve a problem myself it has always backfired in a big way. If I’ve sought help from someone else it’s gone a little better, but if I’ve trusted God it has always turned out right.
My life is far from simple, it never has been well scratched that it was simple when I was a child and didn’t realize just how difficult life truly was. Man, sometimes I sure wish I could go back to those days before you realized what responsibilities are. Having fun takes on a whole new meaning and then you look up and you’re responsible for someone else as well. Being a mom is a fabulous experience but it’s very scary because if you make a decision for yourself and it doesn’t work out then it will affect your child. Never mind if it’s just you who will get affected because as an adult you will bounce back. But when you make a decision for your child you have to think really long and really hard about how it’s all going to work out. The consequences are totally different and it becomes apparent very quickly.
God hears our cries even when we ourselves don’t realize we’re crying out for Him. I find it comforting to know that when no one else has time to hear my thoughts, cares, concerns or complaints God ALWAYS hears me. Once you decide to surrender all your heart, cares, and desires to God you realize you don’t have to do it alone and you’re not alone. You begin to receive great comfort. Once I stopped trying to control everything and allow God to have his will in my life, everything that was supposed to happen did, and I’ve been insanely blessed ever since. You have to make a decision that this is where you want to be and God is who you trust your everything to, then you will slowly see your life transform.
~Joy Norman~
Speak It ... Believe It
Death and life are in the power of the tongue.
(Proverbs 18:21)
There is power in words. We can make or break our lives with the words we speak. We can change our course by the words we utter. However, the power in words is not the words themselves. Rather, it is the source of these words. This means that no matter how positive the words you are releasing, if the source of the words is not coming from the true source, then it will not stand strong. And the only true source is Jesus Christ, the “way”, the “truth”, and the “life”.
John 1:1-3 says: In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God Himself. He was present originally with God. All things were made and came into existence through Him; and without Him was not even one thing made that has come into being.
The true source of the word is the Word Himself, Jesus the Christ, our Yeshua. When we speak the words of Jesus, we release Him and His power over our situations. We take dominion over our circumstances and speak those things which are not as though they were. We bring what is in the spiritual realm to the physical realm.
The Word of God is not only for us to read, meditate, and follow. It is our weapon, which is why our sword for defeating the devil is the Word of God (Ephesians 6). It was given to us by God as some magic formula for any kind of problem. 2 Peter 1:4 says that God bestowed on us His precious and exceedingly great promises so that through them we may escape the moral decay that is in the world.
Now let me explain this a bit further.
When a person gets reborn, her spirit gets regenerated and she receives an access not only to heaven but to God’s abundant blessings. Being reborn does not guarantee that we will never have problems. It does not mean that everything around us will change. However, it guarantees the power of the Word of God, and this is one of the greatest assets that we have as children of God. Since we still live in a fallen world, sickness and all kinds of problems still abound and we are not exempted from these. This is what Peter was saying in the Scripture above about moral decay. Peter was saying that God’s promises, which are His Words, were given to us so we can escape the moral decay of this world. This means that if you are sick, then you can use God’s Word to escape that sickness.
I believe that this is one of the greatest benefits we have as children of God, which a lot of Christians have not tapped into or utilized to the fullest. I’ve seen Christians who would rather succumb to their disease than speak the Word of God over that sickness. I believe that there are two reasons for this: ignorance, and always having another option.
I remember an incident when I was going through a major financial crisis. I didn’t even have money to buy medicine for my son when he got sick one day. I had no other option. I laid hands on him and started speaking God’s Word over his fever. I told him to keep speaking it over himself. The next day, when I called him up from my ministry office to find out how he was, he said, “Mom, my fever is gone. I am healed”. Until this day, and that has been eight years ago, my son relies on the healing power of the Word of God more than any medicine.
We have to rely on God’s Word as if it were our only option. It should not just be our first option but our optimum option. We should speak it and believe it as if there were no medicines or doctors available, and as if there were no other people to help us. We have to be desperate.
We can’t just expect God to move just because we prayed. We have to activate our prayer by standing on the Word of God, speaking and believing it. If you’re praying for deliverance, then don’t just sit there praying for it, get a Word about deliverance and speak it over yourself. Whatever problem you may have, get a Word of God for it. Post it where you can see it everyday and keep speaking it over your situation. Don’t stop until you see it happen. And when it finally happens, share your testimony to others and keep thanking God for it.
~Lisa Maki~
(Proverbs 18:21)
There is power in words. We can make or break our lives with the words we speak. We can change our course by the words we utter. However, the power in words is not the words themselves. Rather, it is the source of these words. This means that no matter how positive the words you are releasing, if the source of the words is not coming from the true source, then it will not stand strong. And the only true source is Jesus Christ, the “way”, the “truth”, and the “life”.
John 1:1-3 says: In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God Himself. He was present originally with God. All things were made and came into existence through Him; and without Him was not even one thing made that has come into being.
The true source of the word is the Word Himself, Jesus the Christ, our Yeshua. When we speak the words of Jesus, we release Him and His power over our situations. We take dominion over our circumstances and speak those things which are not as though they were. We bring what is in the spiritual realm to the physical realm.
The Word of God is not only for us to read, meditate, and follow. It is our weapon, which is why our sword for defeating the devil is the Word of God (Ephesians 6). It was given to us by God as some magic formula for any kind of problem. 2 Peter 1:4 says that God bestowed on us His precious and exceedingly great promises so that through them we may escape the moral decay that is in the world.
Now let me explain this a bit further.
When a person gets reborn, her spirit gets regenerated and she receives an access not only to heaven but to God’s abundant blessings. Being reborn does not guarantee that we will never have problems. It does not mean that everything around us will change. However, it guarantees the power of the Word of God, and this is one of the greatest assets that we have as children of God. Since we still live in a fallen world, sickness and all kinds of problems still abound and we are not exempted from these. This is what Peter was saying in the Scripture above about moral decay. Peter was saying that God’s promises, which are His Words, were given to us so we can escape the moral decay of this world. This means that if you are sick, then you can use God’s Word to escape that sickness.
I believe that this is one of the greatest benefits we have as children of God, which a lot of Christians have not tapped into or utilized to the fullest. I’ve seen Christians who would rather succumb to their disease than speak the Word of God over that sickness. I believe that there are two reasons for this: ignorance, and always having another option.
I remember an incident when I was going through a major financial crisis. I didn’t even have money to buy medicine for my son when he got sick one day. I had no other option. I laid hands on him and started speaking God’s Word over his fever. I told him to keep speaking it over himself. The next day, when I called him up from my ministry office to find out how he was, he said, “Mom, my fever is gone. I am healed”. Until this day, and that has been eight years ago, my son relies on the healing power of the Word of God more than any medicine.
We have to rely on God’s Word as if it were our only option. It should not just be our first option but our optimum option. We should speak it and believe it as if there were no medicines or doctors available, and as if there were no other people to help us. We have to be desperate.
We can’t just expect God to move just because we prayed. We have to activate our prayer by standing on the Word of God, speaking and believing it. If you’re praying for deliverance, then don’t just sit there praying for it, get a Word about deliverance and speak it over yourself. Whatever problem you may have, get a Word of God for it. Post it where you can see it everyday and keep speaking it over your situation. Don’t stop until you see it happen. And when it finally happens, share your testimony to others and keep thanking God for it.
~Lisa Maki~
The Manna Principle
Finally, gramma was able to let go of her chest freezer that has been with her for over 20 years. Whether it was because of her losing memory or because she knows her time is almost up, I don’t know. What I do understand is why she held on to that freezer for so long, including all the stuff that were in it. We found food that was there since the 80’s … food that was saved for the rainy days but which was never used … food that could have fed the hungry … food that could have been cooked a long time ago to share with others.
Yes I understand why gramma and other people like her save all kinds of stuff. However, not because I understand means I approve of it or agree with it. As I always say, “It’s not what Lisa thinks but what God thinks”.
With this, let me bring you to Exodus 16 to see what God Himself thinks.
16 This is what the Lord has commanded: Let every man gather of it as much as he will need, an omer for each person, according to the number of your persons; take it, every man for those in his tent.
17 The [people] did so, and gathered, some more, some less.
18 When they measured it with an omer, he who gathered much had nothing over, and he who gathered little had no lack; each gathered according to his need.
19 Moses said, Let none of it be left until morning.
20 But they did not listen to Moses; some of them left of it until morning, and it bred worms, became foul, and stank; and Moses was angry with them.
21 They gathered it every morning, each as much as he needed, for when the sun became hot it melted.
22 And on the sixth day they gathered twice as much bread, two omers for each person; and all the leaders of the congregation came and told Moses.
It is pretty obvious that God laid down these principles not just for the Israelites during that season but for us, followers and children of God. These principles, based on the Scriptures above, are as follows:
1. Get only what is sufficient for the day and your family.
2. Don’t go beyond what you need or you will not have any use for it.
3. Trust God as your provider.
4. Replenish your supply daily.
5. Enjoy God’s provisions.
There is a reason why God set these principles for us, and that is, for us to rely on Him and not on our own abilities or our possessions. If you have enough savings in the bank for the future, it is easy to say, “I am not worried about the future. I am covered”. Yet, your faith is in your savings more than in God. I should know. I was in this situation before I surrendered my life to Jesus. I was not worried about the future because other than my business, savings, and insurance, I had the ability to make money. Then God took away my business from me, and eventually, he also took away my ability to make money by closing all doors for me. It was a very difficult time that I will be thanking God for, all my life. It was the time I learned to totally rely on Him and the time when He became more alive and powerful in my life. He never left me without support but He only gave me what was sufficient for the day, nothing more or less. I was able to pay my bills and provide for my children.
Until now I still can’t fathom how I survived during those years. There were days when I didn’t even know where my grocery money will come from and God would send someone to me saying, “God told me to give this to you”, and it was the exact amount I needed.
There is nothing wrong with saving for the future. There is nothing wrong with securing your family’s future. There is nothing wrong with being prepared for the future. Yet, if your future tripping is getting in the way of you enjoying the present, then it is no good.
God’s blessings are meant to be enjoyed. And how can you enjoy what you have now if all you are thinking about is the future? How can you enjoy having vacations with your spouse and family if you are more concerned about saving your money for the future so you will have something to use in case one of you gets sick? Isn’t this a reflection of fear and doubt more than faith? Some people can’t even enjoy what they have, no matter how beautiful it is because all they think about is the future.
My godly advice, based on the Manna Principle, is to be balanced and maintain it.
Don’t take more than what you need. If you want to save food for the future, keep replenishing it every now and then. Pay your bills, invest wisely, have some savings, and enjoy your life. Take vacations, buy nice stuff, and don’t be scared to spend for as long as you know that you’ve fulfilled your obligations.
For I have learned how to be content in whatever state I am. I know how to be abased and live humbly in straitened circumstances, and I know also how to enjoy plenty and live in abundance. I have learned in any and all circumstances the secret of facing every situation, whether well-fed or going hungry, having a sufficiency and enough to spare or going without and being in want.
Philippians 4:11-12
~Lisa Maki~
Yes I understand why gramma and other people like her save all kinds of stuff. However, not because I understand means I approve of it or agree with it. As I always say, “It’s not what Lisa thinks but what God thinks”.
With this, let me bring you to Exodus 16 to see what God Himself thinks.
16 This is what the Lord has commanded: Let every man gather of it as much as he will need, an omer for each person, according to the number of your persons; take it, every man for those in his tent.
17 The [people] did so, and gathered, some more, some less.
18 When they measured it with an omer, he who gathered much had nothing over, and he who gathered little had no lack; each gathered according to his need.
19 Moses said, Let none of it be left until morning.
20 But they did not listen to Moses; some of them left of it until morning, and it bred worms, became foul, and stank; and Moses was angry with them.
21 They gathered it every morning, each as much as he needed, for when the sun became hot it melted.
22 And on the sixth day they gathered twice as much bread, two omers for each person; and all the leaders of the congregation came and told Moses.
It is pretty obvious that God laid down these principles not just for the Israelites during that season but for us, followers and children of God. These principles, based on the Scriptures above, are as follows:
1. Get only what is sufficient for the day and your family.
2. Don’t go beyond what you need or you will not have any use for it.
3. Trust God as your provider.
4. Replenish your supply daily.
5. Enjoy God’s provisions.
There is a reason why God set these principles for us, and that is, for us to rely on Him and not on our own abilities or our possessions. If you have enough savings in the bank for the future, it is easy to say, “I am not worried about the future. I am covered”. Yet, your faith is in your savings more than in God. I should know. I was in this situation before I surrendered my life to Jesus. I was not worried about the future because other than my business, savings, and insurance, I had the ability to make money. Then God took away my business from me, and eventually, he also took away my ability to make money by closing all doors for me. It was a very difficult time that I will be thanking God for, all my life. It was the time I learned to totally rely on Him and the time when He became more alive and powerful in my life. He never left me without support but He only gave me what was sufficient for the day, nothing more or less. I was able to pay my bills and provide for my children.
Until now I still can’t fathom how I survived during those years. There were days when I didn’t even know where my grocery money will come from and God would send someone to me saying, “God told me to give this to you”, and it was the exact amount I needed.
There is nothing wrong with saving for the future. There is nothing wrong with securing your family’s future. There is nothing wrong with being prepared for the future. Yet, if your future tripping is getting in the way of you enjoying the present, then it is no good.
God’s blessings are meant to be enjoyed. And how can you enjoy what you have now if all you are thinking about is the future? How can you enjoy having vacations with your spouse and family if you are more concerned about saving your money for the future so you will have something to use in case one of you gets sick? Isn’t this a reflection of fear and doubt more than faith? Some people can’t even enjoy what they have, no matter how beautiful it is because all they think about is the future.
My godly advice, based on the Manna Principle, is to be balanced and maintain it.
Don’t take more than what you need. If you want to save food for the future, keep replenishing it every now and then. Pay your bills, invest wisely, have some savings, and enjoy your life. Take vacations, buy nice stuff, and don’t be scared to spend for as long as you know that you’ve fulfilled your obligations.
For I have learned how to be content in whatever state I am. I know how to be abased and live humbly in straitened circumstances, and I know also how to enjoy plenty and live in abundance. I have learned in any and all circumstances the secret of facing every situation, whether well-fed or going hungry, having a sufficiency and enough to spare or going without and being in want.
Philippians 4:11-12
~Lisa Maki~
Spice Up Your Life (Part 3)
Last month we discovered how 2 spices, honey and cinnamon, have health and wellness benefits when used alone or in combination. This month we will look at a few more spices and see God's marvelous works in these creations.
First of all, your brain enjoys herbs and spices as much as your taste buds do. And spicy foods help you to feel full faster so you don't over eat. Herbs and spices, like black pepper, cinnamon, oregano, basil, parsley, ginger, and vanilla are all high in antioxidants which may help build brain power. The spice, cucumin for example (found in tumeric and used in Indian curries) may help reduce the amyloid plaques that build up in the brains of those suffering from Alzheimer's disease due to its anti-inflammatory properties.
The brain also likes cayenne pepper as it causes the brain to secrete endorphins, which are known as our natural pain relievers. Cayenne may also reduce cholesterol and triglyceride levels, those nasty blood fats related to heart disease and stroke. It aids in gastrointestinal tract conditions including stomachaches, cramping, and gas. In some countries it is used to treat circulatory diseases and to improve circulation in general. Like other peppers, it will rev up your metabolism which may aid in weight loss.
Peppers, in general, are low in calories and a good source of vitamin C. Eating hot peppers can cause one to perspire and thusly cool you off. Hot chili peppers, whose active ingredient is capsaicin, will actually increase your metabolism for an hour after eating. Try sprinkling a few red chili flakes over Italian dishes or substitute a fresh jalapeno for a bell pepper in a recipe.
Ginger is another spice that warms the body and increases perspiration. It does this by stimulating one's circulation which has the added benefit of removing toxins, cleansing the bowels and kidneys, and nourishing the skin. It is an excellent digestive aid for gas, diarrhea, and cramping. A very popular use of ginger is to reduce nausea due to motion sickness and morning sickness. "Ginger Ale, anyone?" It's anti-inflammatory properties reduce the pain of arthritis and muscles spasms. It can even be used as an expectorant.
Garlic is probably one of the most popular spices in use today. It is known as "nature's antibiotic" and will not reduce the body's natural balance of bacteria unlike man-made antibiotics. No risk of producing antibiotic resistant "super bugs" here. It may be used to fight viral infections like colds and flu, as well as bacterial and fungal infections. The selenium in garlic boosts the body's immune responses to these infectious agents.
Garlic also acts as an antioxidant in combination with vitamin E. It aids in detoxifying the body by cleansing the kidneys thus increasing urine output. It has been used as a digestive aid, a cholesterol and blood pressure reducer, and may help to ward off certain cancers of the stomach, breast, liver and colon.
Of course, everyone knows the major drawback of garlic...that distinctive...infamous...need I even say it?..."garlic breath". Agh! Which brings us to our final featured spice---anise.
Anise has a wonderful licorice flavor that will sweeten your breath after all that garlic! It has antiseptic properties as well. You will find it in many brands of cough medicines and lozenges where it is used as a mild expectorant and to soothe a sore or irritated throat. It aids in digestion, and may even cure hiccups if the seeds are taken with a little water.
So there you have it...from hot peppers to stimulate the brain and rev up our metabolism, to spices that fight germs and sweeten our breath. Ahhh, isn't God good! He has provided us with everything to keep our bodies, His temple, functioning as He designed them to function.
Praise Him for His mighty works of creation...and put a little spice in it! Amen!
Blessings to you, loved ones of Christ.
~Karla Hiers~
First of all, your brain enjoys herbs and spices as much as your taste buds do. And spicy foods help you to feel full faster so you don't over eat. Herbs and spices, like black pepper, cinnamon, oregano, basil, parsley, ginger, and vanilla are all high in antioxidants which may help build brain power. The spice, cucumin for example (found in tumeric and used in Indian curries) may help reduce the amyloid plaques that build up in the brains of those suffering from Alzheimer's disease due to its anti-inflammatory properties.
The brain also likes cayenne pepper as it causes the brain to secrete endorphins, which are known as our natural pain relievers. Cayenne may also reduce cholesterol and triglyceride levels, those nasty blood fats related to heart disease and stroke. It aids in gastrointestinal tract conditions including stomachaches, cramping, and gas. In some countries it is used to treat circulatory diseases and to improve circulation in general. Like other peppers, it will rev up your metabolism which may aid in weight loss.
Peppers, in general, are low in calories and a good source of vitamin C. Eating hot peppers can cause one to perspire and thusly cool you off. Hot chili peppers, whose active ingredient is capsaicin, will actually increase your metabolism for an hour after eating. Try sprinkling a few red chili flakes over Italian dishes or substitute a fresh jalapeno for a bell pepper in a recipe.
Ginger is another spice that warms the body and increases perspiration. It does this by stimulating one's circulation which has the added benefit of removing toxins, cleansing the bowels and kidneys, and nourishing the skin. It is an excellent digestive aid for gas, diarrhea, and cramping. A very popular use of ginger is to reduce nausea due to motion sickness and morning sickness. "Ginger Ale, anyone?" It's anti-inflammatory properties reduce the pain of arthritis and muscles spasms. It can even be used as an expectorant.
Garlic is probably one of the most popular spices in use today. It is known as "nature's antibiotic" and will not reduce the body's natural balance of bacteria unlike man-made antibiotics. No risk of producing antibiotic resistant "super bugs" here. It may be used to fight viral infections like colds and flu, as well as bacterial and fungal infections. The selenium in garlic boosts the body's immune responses to these infectious agents.
Garlic also acts as an antioxidant in combination with vitamin E. It aids in detoxifying the body by cleansing the kidneys thus increasing urine output. It has been used as a digestive aid, a cholesterol and blood pressure reducer, and may help to ward off certain cancers of the stomach, breast, liver and colon.
Of course, everyone knows the major drawback of garlic...that distinctive...infamous...need I even say it?..."garlic breath". Agh! Which brings us to our final featured spice---anise.
Anise has a wonderful licorice flavor that will sweeten your breath after all that garlic! It has antiseptic properties as well. You will find it in many brands of cough medicines and lozenges where it is used as a mild expectorant and to soothe a sore or irritated throat. It aids in digestion, and may even cure hiccups if the seeds are taken with a little water.
So there you have it...from hot peppers to stimulate the brain and rev up our metabolism, to spices that fight germs and sweeten our breath. Ahhh, isn't God good! He has provided us with everything to keep our bodies, His temple, functioning as He designed them to function.
Praise Him for His mighty works of creation...and put a little spice in it! Amen!
Blessings to you, loved ones of Christ.
~Karla Hiers~
Marriage is a Healing Ground
Our issues are like rust that settle at the bottom of the barrel. When God starts healing us, these rust rise up and start floating on the surface.
Most of the time we are not even aware that these issues exist. We have buried it so deep that it has hardened inside our hearts. Then one day something happens that stir up these issues from within. You start wondering where they came from, only to realize they’ve been there for years.
Marriage is a place where God starts stirring up these issues. It is in marriage where we experience the most hurtful things simply because our spouse is the closest person to us. We are one with them. They are the ones who will affect us the most … positively and negatively.
I didn’t realize until I got into fights with my husband that I had severe anger issues. I have never been an angry person. What I didn’t realize was that I had deep seated bitterness within me brought about by my hurts from the past. This anger was never expressed. And though I have released forgiveness for the persons who have hurt me, I have not really allowed God to heal me thoroughly. Or perhaps God was just waiting for the most perfect time to heal me, and that is in and through my marriage.
The fights in my marriage was God stirring up the water in the barrel so that the rust will rise up to the surface, and so that He can expose the underlying issues and finally heal them. For how can God expose my anger issues if I don’t get angry? And who else can make me more angry than the man I am one with, and a man who can be very provoking?
Other than my anger issues, God also started exposing pride issues, issues on rejection, lust issues, being easily offended issues, and so much more … issues I didn’t know even existed or still existed.
Since marriage is the most intimate relationship God has designed (other than our relationship with Him), it follows that this is the relationship where we will be most comfortable with and the relationship where we can and will be our true selves. It is in marriage where our defenses are down and where we are most exposed.
Nobody can know you better than your spouse (other than God, of course), and so God will use your spouse to expose something from you that you may not even be aware of. It may not be a deliberate attempt of your spouse to bring it out from you. It may be in the form of an argument, a heated discussion, or a fight.
Though God may begin the process of healing prior to your marriage, it is completed through your marriage. He who began a good work in you will bring it to full completion (Phil. 1:6).
The reason why marriage becomes the completion is because it is also where a man and woman experience completion. I am not saying that God will not heal you thoroughly unless you are married. I am simply talking about marriage and those who are married, and the kind of healing that takes place in that relationship.
Marriage is the union of a man and woman to become one flesh. In marriage, God’s image is truly represented by the man and woman combined. This is why marriage is so valuable to God. It is in fact the symbol He used for Jesus and His church. The Bible starts with a marriage and ends with a marriage. It is for this reason why God will do everything He can to keep the marriage in the right perspective, most especially the marriages of those who are totally surrendered to Him. He wouldn’t want to be represented in a disgraceful way which is the reason why He is in the business not only of healing the husband and the wife but of sanctifying them in and through the marriage.
So don’t be shocked of your fights and arguments and even your disagreements. Don’t give up when you don’t see your spouse changing. Don’t run away when your marriage is getting to be more difficult to handle. These are all necessary to expose your issues so God can heal both of you and therefore sanctify you.
Let God complete the process that He already started. He promised that He will perfect that which concerns you (Psalm 138:8). However, you have to cooperate with Him through your total surrender to what He is doing. Ask Him to show you what He is exposing from you. Ask Him to reveal to you. If you are serious enough, He will.
God bless you!
~Lisa Maki~
Most of the time we are not even aware that these issues exist. We have buried it so deep that it has hardened inside our hearts. Then one day something happens that stir up these issues from within. You start wondering where they came from, only to realize they’ve been there for years.
Marriage is a place where God starts stirring up these issues. It is in marriage where we experience the most hurtful things simply because our spouse is the closest person to us. We are one with them. They are the ones who will affect us the most … positively and negatively.
I didn’t realize until I got into fights with my husband that I had severe anger issues. I have never been an angry person. What I didn’t realize was that I had deep seated bitterness within me brought about by my hurts from the past. This anger was never expressed. And though I have released forgiveness for the persons who have hurt me, I have not really allowed God to heal me thoroughly. Or perhaps God was just waiting for the most perfect time to heal me, and that is in and through my marriage.
The fights in my marriage was God stirring up the water in the barrel so that the rust will rise up to the surface, and so that He can expose the underlying issues and finally heal them. For how can God expose my anger issues if I don’t get angry? And who else can make me more angry than the man I am one with, and a man who can be very provoking?
Other than my anger issues, God also started exposing pride issues, issues on rejection, lust issues, being easily offended issues, and so much more … issues I didn’t know even existed or still existed.
Since marriage is the most intimate relationship God has designed (other than our relationship with Him), it follows that this is the relationship where we will be most comfortable with and the relationship where we can and will be our true selves. It is in marriage where our defenses are down and where we are most exposed.
Nobody can know you better than your spouse (other than God, of course), and so God will use your spouse to expose something from you that you may not even be aware of. It may not be a deliberate attempt of your spouse to bring it out from you. It may be in the form of an argument, a heated discussion, or a fight.
Though God may begin the process of healing prior to your marriage, it is completed through your marriage. He who began a good work in you will bring it to full completion (Phil. 1:6).
The reason why marriage becomes the completion is because it is also where a man and woman experience completion. I am not saying that God will not heal you thoroughly unless you are married. I am simply talking about marriage and those who are married, and the kind of healing that takes place in that relationship.
Marriage is the union of a man and woman to become one flesh. In marriage, God’s image is truly represented by the man and woman combined. This is why marriage is so valuable to God. It is in fact the symbol He used for Jesus and His church. The Bible starts with a marriage and ends with a marriage. It is for this reason why God will do everything He can to keep the marriage in the right perspective, most especially the marriages of those who are totally surrendered to Him. He wouldn’t want to be represented in a disgraceful way which is the reason why He is in the business not only of healing the husband and the wife but of sanctifying them in and through the marriage.
So don’t be shocked of your fights and arguments and even your disagreements. Don’t give up when you don’t see your spouse changing. Don’t run away when your marriage is getting to be more difficult to handle. These are all necessary to expose your issues so God can heal both of you and therefore sanctify you.
Let God complete the process that He already started. He promised that He will perfect that which concerns you (Psalm 138:8). However, you have to cooperate with Him through your total surrender to what He is doing. Ask Him to show you what He is exposing from you. Ask Him to reveal to you. If you are serious enough, He will.
God bless you!
~Lisa Maki~
Familiarity Breeds Contempt
Any true believer knows that the most difficult people to lead to the Lord are those who knew you from your past and those who are very familiar with you. These include your family members, your friends, and those who were close to you and who have seen you at your worst. Jesus Himself said that no prophet is accepted in his hometown.
Why is this so? Shouldn’t those closest to us be the happiest people for our change? Shouldn’t they be the ones who would be rejoicing and wanting what we want too? Sad to say, this is not how they see it. What they see is a person who used to be one of them, someone who they still want to party with, someone who they still want to have fun with. You have to understand that the world’s idea of fun is different from ours. They look at Christians as “kill joy” or “fanatics” or “Jesus freaks”. They want us to be normal, which means, conforming to their standards.
Before I proceed, if you say you are a Christian but you are not experiencing this, then it’s time to examine yourself and your walk. You may still be acting the way they do that’s why they don’t see any difference between you and them.
Most of the time, these people will tell us, “I’m happy for you” or “good for you”, but that’s all there is to it. They still wouldn’t understand what really happened to you until they themselves experience it. Unfortunately, more often than not, it is somebody else and not you, who will be able to lead them to the Lord. However, it is the seeds you have sown into them that serve as the initial deposit made.
Take the case of my husband. He was a very rebellious kid who got in trouble at a very young age. His parents couldn’t handle him so they gave up on him and his grandmother took him into her home. He got hooked on drugs and became one of the worst drug addicts in town. He ended in a mental place and that’s where he found the Lord. Despite the drastic changes in him after he got saved, his family still continued to look at him in the same way. When he started preaching to his family, they just viewed it as another outlet for his rebellion.
Matthew 13:55 explains this pretty good. Then they scoffed, "He's just the carpenter's son, and we know Mary, his mother, and his brothers--James, Joseph, Simon, and Judas.
Those who knew Jesus saw him growing up as a carpenter’s son. This made them doubt when they heard him preach. They couldn’t believe that a carpenter’s son can be wiser than the Pharisees and Sadducees. They were totally blinded.
These people who knew us from our past will always look at us as the same people they knew and will even say, “See, he/she hasn’t changed”. They will always be on the lookout for mistakes on our part. And even if we go down to their level, they will only want us for what they want but not because of Jesus. I have seen this time and time again. The recent incident was with my husband. He had a best friend from the past who he has been trying to reach for the Lord for years. He constantly visited him in prison and after he got out, he let him use our garage to fix his car and gave him so many other privileges. My husband went down to his level only to bring him up to Jesus. It never worked. He took advantage of his privileges, got overdosed at our place, and even wanted to use our house to bring a girl who was married. He never understood what we represented. He looked at my husband as the same old friend he had in the past. Finally, my husband told him, “When you’re ready for Jesus, then we can connect again”. He chose the other way, and definitely not Jesus.
I am not saying that you should not lead your family and friends to the Lord, nor just give up on them. What I am saying is that you can’t expect them to receive you and our Jesus the way you want or expect them to. They will always try to pull you to their side. They will always want you to join them in their fun. They may even make you feel that they like your Jesus just to have you back in their lives. Yet, as I’ve said, what they want is the old you and not the Jesus in you.
Keep being living witnesses of Jesus in their lives. Keep praying for them. However, in reaching out to them, be careful that you don’t compromise. Don’t cater to their emotions just because you want to win them to the Lord. Be firm in your stand and don’t water down your message just because you don’t want to offend them. And though it can be painful, know that this is part of being followers of Jesus. We are not greater than our Master who was persecuted.
~Lisa Maki~
Why is this so? Shouldn’t those closest to us be the happiest people for our change? Shouldn’t they be the ones who would be rejoicing and wanting what we want too? Sad to say, this is not how they see it. What they see is a person who used to be one of them, someone who they still want to party with, someone who they still want to have fun with. You have to understand that the world’s idea of fun is different from ours. They look at Christians as “kill joy” or “fanatics” or “Jesus freaks”. They want us to be normal, which means, conforming to their standards.
Before I proceed, if you say you are a Christian but you are not experiencing this, then it’s time to examine yourself and your walk. You may still be acting the way they do that’s why they don’t see any difference between you and them.
Most of the time, these people will tell us, “I’m happy for you” or “good for you”, but that’s all there is to it. They still wouldn’t understand what really happened to you until they themselves experience it. Unfortunately, more often than not, it is somebody else and not you, who will be able to lead them to the Lord. However, it is the seeds you have sown into them that serve as the initial deposit made.
Take the case of my husband. He was a very rebellious kid who got in trouble at a very young age. His parents couldn’t handle him so they gave up on him and his grandmother took him into her home. He got hooked on drugs and became one of the worst drug addicts in town. He ended in a mental place and that’s where he found the Lord. Despite the drastic changes in him after he got saved, his family still continued to look at him in the same way. When he started preaching to his family, they just viewed it as another outlet for his rebellion.
Matthew 13:55 explains this pretty good. Then they scoffed, "He's just the carpenter's son, and we know Mary, his mother, and his brothers--James, Joseph, Simon, and Judas.
Those who knew Jesus saw him growing up as a carpenter’s son. This made them doubt when they heard him preach. They couldn’t believe that a carpenter’s son can be wiser than the Pharisees and Sadducees. They were totally blinded.
These people who knew us from our past will always look at us as the same people they knew and will even say, “See, he/she hasn’t changed”. They will always be on the lookout for mistakes on our part. And even if we go down to their level, they will only want us for what they want but not because of Jesus. I have seen this time and time again. The recent incident was with my husband. He had a best friend from the past who he has been trying to reach for the Lord for years. He constantly visited him in prison and after he got out, he let him use our garage to fix his car and gave him so many other privileges. My husband went down to his level only to bring him up to Jesus. It never worked. He took advantage of his privileges, got overdosed at our place, and even wanted to use our house to bring a girl who was married. He never understood what we represented. He looked at my husband as the same old friend he had in the past. Finally, my husband told him, “When you’re ready for Jesus, then we can connect again”. He chose the other way, and definitely not Jesus.
I am not saying that you should not lead your family and friends to the Lord, nor just give up on them. What I am saying is that you can’t expect them to receive you and our Jesus the way you want or expect them to. They will always try to pull you to their side. They will always want you to join them in their fun. They may even make you feel that they like your Jesus just to have you back in their lives. Yet, as I’ve said, what they want is the old you and not the Jesus in you.
Keep being living witnesses of Jesus in their lives. Keep praying for them. However, in reaching out to them, be careful that you don’t compromise. Don’t cater to their emotions just because you want to win them to the Lord. Be firm in your stand and don’t water down your message just because you don’t want to offend them. And though it can be painful, know that this is part of being followers of Jesus. We are not greater than our Master who was persecuted.
~Lisa Maki~